Insecure Writer’s Support Group Wednesday

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It’s another rousing edition of the Insecure Writer’s Support Group, created and captained by Alex Cavanaugh. Today there is a big announcement at his site, so be sure to head over and find out what the big news is. Alex’s Site

This month’s co-hosts are:

Heather M. Gardner  http://hmgardner.blogspot.com/
Christine Rains http://christinerains-writer.blogspot.com/
Dolorah at Book Lover  http://dolorah.blogspot.com
Julie Flanders  http://julieflanders.blogspot.com/
Murees Dupé  http://www.mureesdupe.com/   

Put Out in Portland

My latest endeavor “The Haiku For You Project” got off to a crawling, yet fun start in Steamboat Springs, CO a couple weeks ago. I had one scheduled live write-in event, and picked up two, two-hour stints after speaking to the front desk manager at the hotel I was staying, and then getting confirmation from the hotel’s GM. Sure, more poem requests would have been great, but I was still excited and pleased with the results.

I packed my enthusiasm and optimism the following weekend on a trip to Portland, OR. During a family oriented weekend, I had scheduled an event at a SE Portland bookseller, only needing to nail down the exact time of day.

Only four days away I hadn’t heard any confirmation. Finally reaching the store manager, there seemed to be some confusion and eventually she said she thought it was clear on initial contact a month ago that she “didn’t think it would really fit.”

So be it. At least I knew where I stood. The next 48 hours were filled with phone calls, a conversation or two, voice mails, emails, and internet searching, trying to find a business or two to write haiku for their patrons. My brother picked up my latest acquisition, an Alder manual typewriter from a Craigslist ad, so yes, I was anxious to give it a try.

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Wednesday rolled into Thursday without any hits. Landing in Portland Thursday evening, I left on final voicemail, fingers crossed during my detailed message. Arriving at my mother’s house, I checked my email on her computer. It was nice to see one coffee shop manager got back to me, politely refusing for this particular weekend as he was out of the shop and didn’t have anyone to really take on a last minute task. Again, no worries and it was nice to get a response which included an offer for another shot down the road.

And that was it. One email reply. No return calls, no other emails. Nothing. Silence. Dead-of-night-cemetery silence. Commence cricket chirping.

Why can’t others see, hear, or read my passion? Why can’t they share my dreams of success? Or at least, give me the chance to succeed or not?

If not for the rallied support from mother and brother, I might have pitched it all in. Sold both typewriters I know own, folded up my desktop banners, and slipped into the night. Instead, on a dreary, wet, Sunday morning, I scouted two potential locations when the next trip to Portland provides another opportunity (with more advanced planning and notification.)

As I detoured on Marine Drive along the Columbia River a new idea appeared in the splattered raindrops on the windshield which soaked into my brain. It’s related to the “Haiku For You Project,” but offers immediate financial compensation utilizing the tools I already possess.

Disillusioned, frustrated, choco-lated, and a bit of vino later, I survived a few days of steady rejection, exiting the tunnel of funk with more excitement and hope than when I boarded the plane from Denver on Thursday.

Take that! insecurity and doubt. The only thing kicking the curb is going to be your toes. Me, I’m walking down the road of creativity and smiles.

How about you? Been battling rejection, doubt, frustration? Or maybe success? Share how you’ve dealt with either and good luck on the road ahead!

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